Always Waiting
by HazelEyedShadowhunter
Summary: Edward leaves Bella after Carlisle is transferred to America. Bella's thoughts and feelings. I know bad summary. One shot based on Taylor Swift's 'The Way I Loved You' and 'Forever and Always' R&R.


**A/n: Just a little one-shot to relieve my Writer's Block. Based on two of Taylor Swift's songs, **_**The Way I Loved You**_** and **_**Forever and Always**_

But I've been screaming' and fighting'  
And kissing' in the rain  
And it's two a.m. and I'm cursing' your name  
You're so in love that you act insane  
And that's the way I loved you  
Breaking' down and coming' undone  
It's a roller-coaster kinda rush  
And I never knew I could feel that much  
And that's the way I loved you

He can't see the smile I'm faking'  
And my heart's not breaking'  
'Cause I'm not feeling' anything at all

And you were wild and crazy  
Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated  
Got away by some mistake and now

And I stare at the phone and he still hasn't called  
And you feel so low you can't feel nothing at all  
And you flash back to when he said forever and always  
Oh oh  
And it rains in your bedroom everything is wrong  
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone  
Cause I was there when you said forever and always

BPOV

It had been a month since he called. I had given up all hope that he would. Yet, every day, after school, I'd come up and stare at the phone, waiting and then, when he didn't call, I'd bring the phone to my bedside table and cry myself to sleep.

Edward Cullen and I had dated for two weeks, before his father, Carlisle, transferred to America. He had promised to call but I'd heard nothing from him. And over the past few weeks, I'd grown numb, unfeeling, and I knew my father, Charlie, was worried but I couldn't…

I had started dating Jacob Black, to make Charlie less worried. And he was so nice and thoughtful and… perfect, but I didn't love him. I couldn't love him.

I missed Edward. And I miss the feeling of his lips on mine and arguing with him and I missed the rush of being in love. And I doubted that I'd ever feel it again.

I'd flashback to when he was here with me, kissing me, whispering in my ear. "Forever and always," he'd say. But, obviously, he'd lied.

It didn't feel right anymore, nothing did. And I knew that nothing would ever feel right again.

I walked downstairs to the front door, where Jacob was waiting. I faked a smile, but he couldn't tell. I kept my feelings hidden now.

He kissed my cheek and led me outside. He opened the car door and I stepped into his Rabbit. He held my hand all the way. But it felt so very wrong. I felt like I was betraying _him_.

I was silent, lost in my own flashback of him, letting Jacob rattle on. And it pained me to think about him but I couldn't make myself forget him. I couldn't let myself forget anything, not the fights, not the happiness, not the feeling of our his lips against mine, not the sound of his velvety voice, not his messy bronze hair, not his piercing emerald green eyes, but already the memories were slipping away.

I felt a tear run down my cheek, but I wiped it away before Jacob could see. I turned to stare out the window and…

Was it my imagination or did I really see a silver Volvo?

I almost laughed at myself for being so stupid. Who was I kidding? He wasn't coming back. He was probably living it up with blonde bimbos. He's probably already forgotten me.

The time passed quickly, and before I knew it, I was back at home. I walked up to my room and waited, staring at the phone like I had done for the past month.

At eleven o'clock, I grew tired of waiting and went to bed. This time no tears came. I promised myself that I wouldn't waste any more time crying over Edward Cullen. I wouldn't wait for him anymore. I had given up. He wasn't coming back.

I woke up the next morning and went to school in my truck. That morning I didn't look for his Volvo in the parking lot like I usually did. I didn't stare at his seat in class, like I had done before. And I didn't stare at our table at lunch reliving the times when we were together.

My best friend Rosalie sat with me and comforted me. We were both silent. It wasn't just Edward that had left with Carlisle. It was our best friend Alice as well. Her bright and bubbly personality was missed by both Rosalie and I and it really showed.

The school day went passed slowly, each minute felt like a year with the absence of Alice and Edward. I retreated to my room, looking for my photo album, which I hadn't looked at in a month.

There were pictures from my birthday party, where Alice had thrown a huge party, and pictures from our first date. And I took each picture out, and ripped them in half, and then into quarters, until I had a pile of ripped photos. And I burnt all the photos, crying as I did so. Finally, as a last symbolic step of my decision to get over the loss, I threw the ashes out the window. And I threw the empty photo album out.

But, it didn't make me feel any better. In fact, the hole in my chest got bigger, and my heart broke into small pieces that could never be healed.

And then the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Bella," said a familiar velvety voice. "I'm coming home."

**A/n: What did you think?**


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